Monday, May 27, 2013

Enjoy the Holidays by Avoiding Unnecessary Conversations about Your Diet

Oftentimes when vegetarians and vegans spend the holidays with their meat-eating friends and family, not only do we deal with the gross out factor of watching others eat dead animals, but the conversations aren't always the most pleasant to have. People question you on your choices and try to put you on trial for choosing to be vegetarian or vegan. And who wants to be around that?

On the vegan groups on Facebook, I have seen the aftermath of these dreaded conversations over and over again. People question your choices, ask ignorant questions, and sometimes just result in outright insulting you. I ran into this first hand the other day, but not with friends or family.

A proprietor of honey was asking why some vegans ate honey and others didn't. He couldn't understand why honey wouldn't be vegan since he claims bees only collect the honey and they don't produce it. (I know...don't get me started...) I simply told him that a vegan chooses not to use products from other animals and that includes things like meat, eggs, dairy, honey, silk, wool, etc. I also explained that there is a spectrum in every line of beliefs and that some vegans choose to eat honey while others do not. I thought my answer was the simplest answer I could provide him without trying to go into individual philosophies or getting on a soapbox. What happened next still blows my mind.

Not only did the man not understand, and believe me, I had high hopes since he asked the question, but he crossed over into the land of sheer ignorance. He literally asked me how I could possibly call myself a vegan because materials in my car were made from animals and materials on the road were made from animals so I use animal products every day. As politely as I could (I was in public mind you), I informed him that as a vegan, I do my best to avoid animal products and live according to my beliefs within this society. If I had the option of choosing a completely vegan car, I would, but there are some things I have no control over, so I do the best I can with products that are within my control. So again he told me I wasn't a vegan. I asked him what were vegans supposed to do, sit home and never leave their house? And to my surprise, he said yes. At this point I was beyond pissed off because I couldn't believe the ignorance of this man, but I merely told him that what he said offended me because vegans have every right to contribute to society and to live according to our beliefs just like everyone else. I also knew at this point there would be no intelligent discussion to have here, so I simply repeated that he had asked a question about why honey was vegan and I restated the basic answer. I said if you can't understand that, I don't know what else to tell you and I left.

I wanted to share this story because these types of conversations, and even worse, often happen with our own families. We can either be sucked into the conversation and destroy what could be an enjoyable time with our family, or we can rise above it and not partake in the conversations. In the above situation, I was caught off guard because I was merely trying to answer a question that seemed to be asked in sincerity. But I got out of the conversation as fast as I could when I saw it was a lost cause because I didn't want it to affect my day any more than it already had.

So my advice to you is that when you are with family and friends, avoid these types of conversations altogether. Even an innocent question can veer off into unexpected territory. Instead, take the high road and just tell people you are there to enjoy time with them, not talk about your diet or life choices. If they keep persisting, tell them you're open to talk to them about it at a later time. Hopefully, your friends and family will take the hint and also choose to merely enjoy each other's company.

Wishing you peas and good health,

VeggiePatti

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